Tag Archives: negative fantasies

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negative fantasies

Negative Fantasies May Be What’s Stopping You

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Have you ever slowed, stalled, or stopped because of negative fantasies? It happens to many people and it may be happening to you.

A negative fantasy is the idea that you are imagining the worst possible outcome. Instead of fantasizing about something positive or joyful, you’re imagining what happens next will be something terrible.

Perhaps you have an important meeting this week. Your schedule is tight but you’ve made room and this is your one shot. You may fantasize that your car won’t start, traffic will make you late, or the outcome of the meeting will be the worst possible scenario instead of the best.

You may have negative fantasies about an upcoming dental check-up, a doctor’s visit, or why your boss has summoned you to her office.

Sometimes it happens before a big presentation. The slide deck might crash, you’ll trip over your words, forget what you were supposed to say, or the audience won’t get your silly joke.

It could everything from an image of a rainstorm during your outdoor party to the image that eating one cookie is going to make you obese.

Negative Fantasies

Negative fantasies may be a valuable marker that helps those who procrastinate or take situations for granted. It may help reel them in, keep them grounded, and perhaps most of all, keep them humble.

Too much fantasizing though, and it may derail performance. It may cause unnecessary worry and anxiety. In severe cases, it may cause people to hold back, stop trying, or never take any risk at all.

Risk is a fact of life. Taking little or no risk will hold you back.

Do you feel stuck or stalled? Is time flying by and when you look back, you’re fearful you haven’t done enough or accomplished enough?

Do you ask yourself why?

Your personal forecast of your future may be exactly what is slowing you down.

A positive fantasy seems much more valuable and realistic.

Try it.

-DEG

Dennis E. Gilbert is a business consultant, speaker (CSPTM), and culture expert. He is a five-time author and the founder of Appreciative Strategies, LLC. His business focuses on positive human performance improvement solutions through Appreciative Strategies®. Reach him through his website at Dennis-Gilbert.com or by calling +1 646.546.5553.


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new ideas

New Ideas Are Not Your Normal

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Do you know someone who knows it all? Have you ever been accused of acting like a know-it-all? Are you receptive to new ideas or would you rather stick with the old?

Many people are risk adverse. They’ve tried risk, it is scary and often doesn’t end well. At least, that is what they’ll say.

Assessing Risk

People often weigh risk inappropriately. In the workplace their personal scale is off balance. They weigh the risk of personal discomfort as greater than needs of the team or organization.

When an employee has a great idea, he or she may be hesitant to mention it. If they have some information contrary to the CEO’s beliefs, they avoid the conversation. The risk of personal harm feels greater than the risk of speaking up and helping the organization avoid some certain disaster.

New ideas are often met with negative fantasies. The doom and gloom that you visualize seems far more real than the possibility of a better outcome.

This is often where instincts and gut feel gain traction.

Ideas that are not our own are a surefire way to invoke an assessment of probable outcomes. Some of those outcomes are rooted in negative fantasies. The assumed pending doom feels more real, than the likely actual outcome.

When we lack new ideas or new outlooks, we’re stuck. New ideas are different, that doesn’t necessarily make them wrong.

Getting to New Ideas

Being a know-it-all, or accusing someone of the same is sometimes a hint that new ideas are not welcome.

If everything seems to be perfect, goals are being met, professional growth is good, and the organization you work for is growing then for the moment it is probably OK to steer clear of any new ideas.

For everyone else, new ideas may be exactly what you need to explore.

-DEG

Dennis E. Gilbert is a business consultant, speaker (CSPTM), and culture expert. He is a five-time author and the founder of Appreciative Strategies, LLC. His business focuses on positive human performance improvement solutions through Appreciative Strategies®. Reach him through his website at Dennis-Gilbert.com or by calling +1 646.546.5553.


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